MCADETS, this is an outdated news blurb mostly for you.

While we did miss you at the party a few weeks ago, it should further be said that you missed out on Brock and Steve playing sets, some truly awesome costumes, and a crowd of well over 60 people trying to get booze in the classiest way possible.

I led the keg-stand contest, and Sam and Brock held my legs up ever so high!

We were overwhelmed quickly, as many, MANY people rushed in and partook of the party treats and brews. Shortly after the party “was in full swing” we realized, we didn’t know half the people who were there. And thems was rowdy folk. There were the matching pimps, the gang of Droogs from “A Clockwork Orange”, and the Mammogrambot 4000 who spent most of the night groping folk, oh such an array of weirdness. We ran out of beer quickly, and favor turned against us. It was hot, stinky, and the floor had an eerie wavering to it, much like a sine wave to the beat of Steve’s tunes. Craziness. We eventually kicked folk out and counted our dollars and the party was declared profitable, if not necessarily a good time for us, the hosts.
Here’s a scary-ass picture of Sam.

Scawwy! OOOOH SCAWWWWY!

I don’t have art or movies or anything else of worth to write about right now (although, putting up NERD ALERT isn’t a shabby idea), so here’s an ADORABLE youtube vid Steve sent me. It brightened my day, I hope it’ll do the same for you!

Best Halloween ever? 

Cute.

X-mas time is always a complicated season. I mean, sure there are the socio-religious issues to be brought up, but on a purely economic level, it’s hard to buy all the rediculously awesome game releases that come out this time of the year. That’s not even beginning to look at actually having the time to play them. I realize this argument is incredibly infantile; “Waaaah, I don’t have enough money or time to do what I wanna do!” I get it, I do. But gimme a second to explain it all.

Games today are $60 new. Lame. Granted it’s only $10 dollars more, but it does create a bit of mental barrier. Ok, now, games are LONGER than they used to be. On average, at least 14 hours long, not including actually taking one’s time and throughly beating a game. The xbox360’s achievement system doesn’t make it any easier. It’s dumb, but I like going through and getting achievements. It feels good on some stupid “Hey, you did it!” level, and I like it. So now it costs more, and takes longer in the process.

Here’s what came out in the last month and is still coming out this December, with prices:
skate. – $60
Halo 3 – $60
Beautiful Katamari – $40
The Orange Box – $60
PGR4 – $60
Assassin’s Creed – $60
Rock Band – $170

Not to mention downloadable games over Live!, this is a lot of time and money that I don’t really have. While this does lead to carful selection and good saving, it also leads to balancing “Well do I wanna play with friends or by myself?”. I wanna play with friends, so I won’t be getting Aassassin’s Creed until well after the new year, in exchange, I’ll invest a hefty penny into Rock Band, which I know the house will enjoy. Skate was much the same deal. I can play with Steve and MCADets, or the house can enjoy Beautiful Katamari. Katamari came first.

It’s hard not to seem like a big baby, but it’s big buisness and big dollars, and I sir, am a touch frustrated.

Ok, so not so much of a 24 hour challenge, more of a general invite to the SB! commune. As previously stated, the show’s name is now “NERD ALERT!” with Tim and Sam. The first episodes’ filming was a bit slow but overall, good. We’ll hopefully have a video if not audio cast up soon-ish. So yeah, if you wanna, draw us a pretty thing to scan in and it could be the background of the show (WE CAN GREENSCREEN THIS B!)

Thanks!

Tim and Sam

I know this isn’t the best thing, but I like you guys, and sharing is caring:

God DAMNIT. AHHHHHHHHHH!

I had intended to create some bastardized parody of R. Kelly’s now perrennial classic, but I’m lazy, and that would be dumb, so I did this.

It’s something seen rarely outside of television sitcoms and scenarios in which poor, poor Emilio has his mutha-fuckin’ eyes gouged-out, but yesterday, I got to live a little. I got trapped in the elevator! And it was awesome! Here’s how you can get stuck in an elevator too!

1) Find the oldest, funkiest smelling elevator you know of (if it creaks, is really loud, or kinda sputters, this is a plus).
2) Get in, press a button, why don’t you?
3) Elevator has to seem like it’s not moving (You might not be able to do that on your own, but keep riding the thing until it does it).
4) Check to see if the elevator is moving by pressing every floor button. It shouldn’t work. If it did, you didn’t get stuck.
5) Try the open door buttons (however they shouldn’t work, or if they do, they reveal you are between floors; a major plus).

Intermission: At this point, look around you. Are there other people in the elevator? If so, feel free to A) Inform them that they are in fact now trapped with you in an elevator, allowing them to panic thusly. Or B) tell them this is the slowest elevator on campus and act like you know what’s up. Hell, there’s even C) start pretending that you’re crazy, and then inform that they’re trapped in the elevator with you.

6) Look for a phone in the elevator. (There wasn’t one in mine, but hey, elevators is elevators, not talky-boxes)
7) Call someone either via mobile, or “I is trapped in elevator” phone (if offered).
8) Be patient with the person on the other end of the phone. They’ll be assuming that you’re freaking out and shitting yourself with terror, when really, you find the situation kinda funny.
9) Sit down and start doing homework (you’re gonna be there for a while, it’ll be good to get things done. Besides, you didn’t bring a music or video player).
10) Don’t even think about the bathroom. Don’t. It’s best that way.
11) Wait for “rescue” by “professionals” (This is arguably the longest step, and be sure to scoff when the police officer offers you an ambulance. Where are you going to go in it?).
12) Tell all your friends in a rediculous manner about how you spent almost an hour in an elevator, keepin’ it real.

Oh yes. NOW YOU CAN DO THIS! ELEVATOR PARTAY! Here is a photo from when I was trapped.

My flame thrower was really messing up folk. I wish I had seen giant rock dude though. He would have loved to have been on fire. I got a wicked amount of points.

Here he is.  This is the bad man-bird.  He touched me.

His name is Herkey, and he is the school mascot of the University of Iowa.  I’ve known Herkey to have a bit of a history.  He’s gotten in fights with other mascots, he’s booed other teams, and one time I saw him give the middle finger(feather?) to a 5 year old kid.  But I never thought I would be victim to his unfunny attempts at “Herkey Humor”.

I was at the University Fundraising Kickoff for the United Way and other local charities, taking notes on the affair and looking very dour, as I was concerned as to why the University of Iowa cheerleaders were doing pep-rally cheers for 25 odd people who were all associated with the kickoff, when all of a sudden I felt someone massaging me.  Now, I like getting massages, I’m not totally unreasonable.  But when I looked behind me expecting to see a friend, and saw that bastard.  I felt violated.  I could smell the fetid bird breath shooting out of his big yellow beak.  He then made light of the fact I was taking notes, pretending to read them and then I do believe he gestured that he did not know how to read.  How sad Herkey.  How sad.  I’ve never been to a Hawkeye sporting event of any kind, but now I’m almost afraid to go, out of fear of a post-traumatic stress breakdown.  God damn you, Herkey.

I do! I declare it right here!

I’ve entered the realm of super nerdry.
I’ve gotten back into collecting action figures (of a sort).
Now Lindsey collects robots, Patrick collects Japanese films, I collect Minimates.
While admitedly neither as hip nor as classy as the prior two, I like them.
They’re 2 inch tall action figures all based on an identical body (Like Kubriks) with different paint jobs (the Silver Surfer in this image).

The Galactus is actually a 14 inch tall BAF (Build-A-Figure or Bad-Ass-Figure, god help me) from the Marvel Legends line. He’s big. I liked that. I also found this over the weekend at the comic book shop and even the clerk asked if I wanted a bag to “Hide my shame”. Touche clerk. Touche.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to cry silently to myself while re-enacting that one time when the Surfer totally teams up with the FF to beat the pants of that Planet Eating Mother Effer.

So, bomb threats have been an uncommon, though seemingly natural part of my University of Iowa experience. It’s happened at least 3 times in as many years, and today it got a little bit weirder.

An email was sent in today anonymously, stating that four pipe bombs had been constructed and placed on campus (the university has not released specific locations, or if the e-mail even specified)with several parts of campus having been examined almost at random, until a package was found between the Old Capitol (historical landmark) and Jessup Hall (roughly put, the nervous center of the university, see map). Said package was detonated by the Iowa City bomb squad, sounding roughly “like a bunch of of 12-guage shot guns going off” according to the building’s maitenance crew.

I work roughly in over half the buildings in the College of Liberal Arts and Sciences on campus (the right side of the map, also with exceptions). Eerily, I don’t feel all that upset considering the nature of the situation, but it can be said today has been an interesting day to say the least. More as it comes in.

MA DVD SHELF IS BETTER THAN YOURS.
Goddamn right, it’s better than yours.
I could fix it, but than I’d have to charge.

The fact that we could do this, is upsetting, truly. But still, it’s pretty. And now it’s better. Updates coming on the NEW AND IMPROVED SHELF. That’s right, I have a bigger one now. MADNESS!

The sign above says “NO NERDS” which is funny, considering.